10 Reasons

   Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Women
     (and what they actually mean)


10. I think of you as a brother.
    (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in
   "Deliverance.")

9. There's a slight difference in our ages.
   (I don't want to do my dad.)

8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way.
  (You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes on.)

7. My life is too complicated right now.
  (I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear
  phone calls from all the other guys I'm seeing.)

6. I've got a boyfriend.
  (I prefer my male cat and a half gallon of Ben and Jerry's.)

5. I don't date men where I work.
  (I wouldn't date you if you were in the same 'solar system',
    much less the same building.)

4. It's not you, it's me.
  (It's you.)

3. I'm concentrating on my career.
  (Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better
   than dating you.)

2. I'm celibate.
  (I've sworn off only the men like you.)

1. Let's be friends.
  (I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating
  detail  about all the other men I meet and have sex with. It's the male    
  perspective thing.)


In response...The male perspective on the same issue...

   Top 10 rejection lines given by Men
    (and what they actually mean...)

10. I think of you as a sister.
   (You're ugly.)

9. There's a slight difference in our ages.
  (You're ugly.)

8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way.
  (You're ugly.)

7. My life is too complicated right now.
  (You're ugly.)

6. I've got a girlfriend.
  (You're ugly.)

5. I don't date women where I work.
 (You're ugly.)

4. It's not you, it's me.
 (You're ugly.)

3. I'm concentrating on my career.
 (You're ugly.)

2. I'm celibate.
 (You're ugly.)

1. Let's be friends.
 (You're sinfully ugly.)


PASS THIS ON TO AT LEAST 4 PERSONS OR WILL GET REJECTED FOR THE
REST OF YOUR LIFE!

What is Love R u in love

Are you really in love? 

Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing And is your voice caught within your chest? It isn't love, it's LIKE. You can't keep your eyes off of them, Am I right? It isn't love, it's LUST. Are you proud, and eager to show them off? It isn't love, it's LUCK Do you want them because you know they're there? It isn't love, it's LONELINESS Are you there because it's what everyone wants? It isn't love, it's LOYALTY Do you stay for their confessions of love, because you don't want to hurt them? It isn't love, it's PITY Do you belong to them because their sight makes you heart skip a beat? It isn't love, it's INFATUATION Are you there because they kissed you, or held your hand? It isn't love, it's UNCONFIDENCE. Do you pardon their faults because you care about them? It isn't love, it's FRIENDSHIP Do you tell them everyday they are the only one you think of? It isn't love, it's a LIE. Are you willing to give up all of your favorite things for their sake? It isn't love, it's CHARITY But do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and elation pulls you close and holds you? Does your heart ache and break when they're sad? Do you cry for their pain, even when they're strong? Do you accept their faults because they're part of who they are? Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts? Would you give them your heart, your life, your death? Then it's LOVE......

Habits of Current Generation for Conversation

SIGNS THAT YOU'VE HAD TOO MUCH OF THE 90'S

1. You try to enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3

4. You e-mail your buddy who works at the desk next to you to
     ask: "Do you wanna go get a coke?"; and he replies: "Yeah,
     give me five Mins"

5. You chat several times a day with a stranger from South
     America, but you haven't spoken to your next door neighbour
     yet this year.

6. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that
     they are not online.

7. Your idea of being organised is multiple coloured post-it notes.

8. You hear most of your jokes via email rather than in person.

9. When you go home after a long day at work you still answer
     the phone in a business like manner.

10. When you make phone calls from home, you automatically
     dial a "0" to get an outside line.

11. Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.

12. You really get excited about a 1.7% pay increase.

13. You know exactly how many days you've got left until you retire.

14. Free food left over from meetings is your staple diet.

15. Being sick is defined as you can't walk or you're in the hospital.

16. You're already late on the assignment you just received.

17. Your relatives and friends describe your job as "works with computers".

18. You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting.

.....................AND THE CLINCHERS ARE..........................

19. You read this entire list and you keep nodding and smiling.

20. As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your
     "friends you send jokes to" e-mail group.

21. It crosses your mind that your "jokes group" may have already seen this
     list but you don't have time to check so you forward it anyway.

COMPUTER TERMS

                            COMPUTER TERMS

BIT:            A word used to describe computers, as in "Our son's
               computer cost quite a bit."

BOOT:           What your friends give you because you spend too much time
               bragging about your computer skills.

BUG:            What your eyes do after you stare at the tiny green
               computer screen for more than 15 minutes.
               Also: what computer magazine companies do to you after
               they get your name on their mailing list.

CHIPS:          The fattening, non-nutritional food computer users eat to
               avoid having to leave their keyboards for meals.

COPY:           What you have to do during school tests because you spend
               too much time at the computer and not enough studying.

CURSOR:         What you turn into when you can't get your computer to
               perform, as in "You $#% computer!"

DISK:           What goes out in your back after bending over a computer
               keyboard for seven hours.

DUMP:           The place all your former hobbies wind up soon after you
               get a new computer.

ERROR:          What you made the first time you walked into a computer
               showroom to "just look."

EXPANSION UNIT: The new room you have to build on to your home to house
               your computer and all its peripherals.

FILE:           What your secretary can now do to her nails six and a half
               hours a day, now that the computer does her day's work in
               30 minutes.

FLOPPY:         The condition of a constant computer user's stomach due
               to lack of exercise and a steady diet of junk food
 
HARDWARE:       Tools, such as lawn mowers, rakes and other heavy
               equipment you haven't laid a finger on since getting
               your computer.

IBM:            The kind of missile your family members and friends would
               like to drop on your computer so you'll pay attention to
               them again.

MENU:           What you'll never see again after buying a computer
               because you'll be too poor to eat in a restaurant.

MONITOR:        Often thought to be a word associated with computers,
               this word actually refers to those obnoxious kids who
               always want to see your hall pass at school.

PROGRAMS:       Those things you used to look at on your television before
               you hooked your computer up to it.
RETURN:         What lots of people do with their computers after only
               a week and a half.

TERMINAL:       A place where you can find buses, trains and really good
               deals on hot computers.

WINDOW:         What you heave the computer out of after you accidentally
               erase a program that took you three days to set up.

True Friends

A true friend never walks away
A true friend will always stay
A true friend looks out for you

A true friend will guard your secrets
Like a precious gift
A true friend is there for you
To give you a helpful lift

A true friend tries to make you smile
Tries to replace that frown
They may not always succeed
But they rarely let you down

These arms for you are open
This heart for you does care
And when I think you need me
I'll try to always be there


I'll listen to your fears
I promise not to laugh
Comfort your falling tears
I'll make this friendship last

I'll keep you near to my heart
I'll always hold you dear
Even when we're miles apart
Even when you're here

I hope I am to you
Everything you are to me
For the friendship we have
Is a special one indeed.

Here's a few reasons why guys like girls

here's a few reasons why guys like girls

  1.  They will always smell good even if its just shampoo
  2.  The way their heads always find the right spot on our shoulder
  3.  How cute they look when they sleep
  4.  the ease in which they fit into our arms
  5.  the way they kiss you and all of a sudden everything is right in
      the world
  6.  How cute they are when they eat
  7.  The way they take hours to get dressed but in the end it makes it
      all worth while
  8.  because they are always warm even when its minus 30 out side
  9.  the way they look good no matter what they wear
  10. the way they fish for compliments even though you both know that
      you think she's the most beautiful thing on this earth
  11. How cute they are when they argue
  12. the way her hand always finds yours
  13. the way they smile
  14. the way you feel when you see their name on the call display after
      you just had a big fight
  15. the way she says "lets not fight anymore" even though you know
      that an hour later....
  16. the way they kiss when you do something nice for them
  17. The way they kiss you when you say "I love you'
  18. actually... just the way they kiss you...
  19. the way they fall into your arms when they cry
  20. then the way they apologize for crying over something that silly
  21. The way they hit you and expect it to hurt
  22. then the way apologize when it does hurt ..(even though we don't
      admit it!)
  23. the way they say "I miss you"
  24. the way you miss them
  25. the way their tears make you want to change the world so that it
      doesn't hurt her anymore.....Yet regardless if you love them, hate
      them, wish they would die or know that you would die without them...
      it matters not. Because once in your life, whatever they were to the
      world they become everything to you. When you look them in the eyes,
      traveling to the depths of their souls and you say a million things
      without trace of a sound, you know that your own life is inevitable
      consumed within the rhythmic beatings of her very heart. We love them
      for a million reasons, No paper would do it justice. It is a thing not
      of the mind but of the heart. A feeling. Only felt.

I have learned some facts of love

I've learned-
that you cannot make someone love you.
All you can do is be someone who can be loved.
The rest is up to them.

I've learned-
that no matter how much I care,
some people just don't care back.

I've learned-
that it takes years to build up trust,
and only seconds to destroy it.

I've learned-
that it's not what you have in your life
but who you have in your life that counts.

I've learned-
that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes.
After that, you'd better know something.

I've learned-
that you shouldn't compare
yourself to the best others can do.

I've learned-
that you can do something in an instant
that will give you heartache for life.

I've learned-
that it's taking me a long time
to become the person I want to be.

I've learned-
that you should always leave loved ones
with loving words.  It may be the last time you see them.

I've learned-
that you can keep going
long after you can't.

I've learned-
that we are responsible for what we do,
no matter how we feel.

I've learned
that either you control your attitude
or it controls you.

I've learned-
that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first,
the passion fades and
there had better be something else to take its place.

I've learned-
that heroes are the people
who do what has to be done
when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.

I've learned-
that money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I've learned-
that my best friend and I can do anything
or nothing and have the best time.

I've learned-
that sometimes the people you expect
to kick you when you're down
will be the ones to help you get back up.

I've learned-
that sometimes when I'm angry
I have the right to be angry,
but that doesn't give me
the right to be cruel.

I've learned-
that true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

I've learned-
that just because someone doesn't love
you the way you want them to doesn't
mean they don't love you with all they have.

I've learned-
that maturity has more to do with
what types of experiences you've had
and what you've learned from them
and less to do with how many
birthdays you've celebrated.

I've learned-
that you should never tell a child
their dreams are unlikely or outlandish.
Few things are more humiliating, and what
a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I've learned-
that your family won't always be there for you.
It may seem funny, but people you aren't
related to can take care of you and love you
and teach you to trust people again.
Families aren't biological.

I've learned-
that no matter how good a friend is,
they're going to hurt you every once in a while
and you must forgive them for that.

I've learned-
that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by
others.  Sometimes you are to learn to forgive yourself.

I've learned-
that no matter how bad your heart is broken
the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I've learned-
that our background and circumstances
may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we become.

I've learned-
that just because two people argue,
it doesn't mean they don't love each other
And just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned-
that we don't have to change friends
if we understand that friends change.

I've learned-
that you shouldn't be so eager to find out asecret.
It could change your life forever.

I've learned-
that two people can look at the exact same
thing and see something totally different.

I've learned-
that no matter how you try to protect your
children, they will eventually get hurt and you
will hurt in the process.

I've learned-
that your life can be changed in a matter of
hours by people who don't even know you.

I've learned-
that even when you think you have no more to give,
when a friend cries out to you,
you will find the strength to help.

I've learned-
that credentials on the wall
do not make you a decent human being.

I've learned-
that the people you care about most in life
are taken from you too soon.

I've learned-
that it's hard to determine where to draw
the line between being nice and not hurting
people's feelings and standing up
for what you believe.

Send this to all the people you have faith in.