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Showing posts with label Santa and Banta Joke. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Santa and Banta Joke. Show all posts

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Santa and Banta Joke




Santa Singh Vs. Pope


About a century or two ago, the Pope decided that all the migrants to leave Italy. Naturally there was a big uproar from them.

So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate with a member of any of one those who had gathered. If he won, then all could stay. If the Pope won, all of them would leave.

Every one was nervous except for a middle-aged man named Santa Singh to represent them. Santa Singh asked for one addition to the debate. To make it more interesting, neither side would be allowed to talk. The Pope agreed.

Santa Singh and the Pope sat opposite each other for a full minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers.

Santa Singh looked back at him and raised one finger.

The Pope waved his fingers in a circle around his head.

Santa Singh pointed to the ground where he sat.

The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine.

Santa Singh pulled out an apple.

The Pope stood up and said, - I give up. This man is too good. He, his folks and all others can stay.

An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking him what had happened. The Pope said, First I held up three fingers to represent the trinity. He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that there was still one God common to both our religions. Then I waved my finger around me to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground and showing that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to show that God absolves us from our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of original sin. He had an answer for everything. What could I do?

Meanwhile, Santa Singh's folks had crowded around the triumphant Santa Singh. What happened?, they asked.

Well, said Santa Singh, First he said to that we all had three days to get out of here. I told him that not one of us was leaving. Then he told me that this whole city would be cleared of us. I let him know that we were staying right here.

Yes, yes, and then??? asked the crowd.

I don't know, said Santa Singh, He took out his lunch, and I took out mine !!




Santa Singh drinking alone in a London bar notices a strikingly sexy
woman sitting in a corner, alone and staring at him. At first he tries to
ignore her, but the sight of her huge endowments is still rolling in his mind and
he looks at her again.

Now the woman smiles back at him and Santa gets very excited.  He
gulps down a couple of stiff ones and gathering courage  goes upto her and says, "Excuse me...I am
Santa from India, can I buy you a  drink and join you?"

The woman agrees and soon both of them are drinking  away like good
old friends. Then at closing time Santa and the lady walk  out of the bar.  But
Santa is    in a very amourous mood and again  gathering courage, and slightly drunk, he asks
her, "Eschcuse me, can we have sex tonight, please??"


The lady says, "Well I don t mind, but you see I'm  on my menstrual cycle"

"No problem" says Santa "you proceed in your menstrual cycle, I follow
you in my Honda Accord !"

Ha.....Ha.....Ha...........

Santa and Banta Joke


Interview !!!

Santa and Banta are two friends and Santa Singh has a very good job.

Banta Singh is jobless and one day asks Santa for a good job.
Santa Singh says that the next time they would apply together.
And they do.

On the interview day, Santa says, "First I will go inside and answer all the questions except the last one and after coming out, I will give you all the answers and questions. So you go and answer and you'll get the job."

So Santa goes in.

Employer: When did we get independence?

Santa: Efforts began in 1857, but we got freedom in 1947.

Employer: Good. Who's our PM?

Santa: It changes daily and these days it's Manmohan singh.

Employer: Ok. What's India's population?

Santa: (He was not to reply last one) Good question, research is going on, and when I know,I will tell you sir.

He comes out and tells Banta about all the questions and answers.

Banta was really excited and he remembers all the answers but forgets all the questions. So he goes in now.

Employer: When were you born?

Banta: Efforts started in 1857 but we got freedom in 1947.

Employer: What? Who's your father?

Banta: It changes daily and these days it's Atal Behari Vajpayee.

Employer:(he's upset now)Are you mad Mr Banta?

Banta: Good question Sir, research is going on, and when I know, I
will tell you.

Bantasingh's Interview


> > > > > > > >Once Banta Singh attended an Interview.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Give me the opposite words.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Ok
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Made in India
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Destroyed in Pakistan
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Keep it Up
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Put it Down
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: MaxiMum
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Maxi Dad
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Enough! Take your Seat
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Don't take my seat
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Idiot! Take your Seat
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Clever! Don't take my Seat
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: I say you get out!
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: You didn't say I come in
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: I reject you!
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: You Appoint me
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Interviewer: ....!!!!!!!

Bantasingh's Interview


> > > > > > > >Once Banta Singh attended an Interview.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Give me the opposite words.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Ok
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Made in India
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Destroyed in Pakistan
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Keep it Up
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Put it Down
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: MaxiMum
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Maxi Dad
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Enough! Take your Seat
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Don't take my seat
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: Idiot! Take your Seat
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: Clever! Don't take my Seat
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: I say you get out!
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: You didn't say I come in
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interviewer: I reject you!
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Banta Singh: You Appoint me
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Interviewer: ....!!!!!!!